The Full English
“It’s a bish-bosh, wish-wash, car crash mishmash!”
Ever wondered where the word ‘hoo-ha’ comes from? Why there ain’t no party like a double negative party? And why ‘bead’ doesn’t rhyme with ‘bread’, ‘machine’ doesn’t rhyme with ‘nine,’ and don’t get me started on ‘yearly’ and ‘early’?
From gangs of gung-ho Anglo-Saxons and smelly Vikings to Covidiots and Instagram influencers, from enormous vowel movements to katsu curries self-isolating in the Twitterverse, this one-woman show by spoken word artist and linguistics nerd, Melanie Branton, explores the history of the our lovely language through the media of performance poetry, silly hats and dad jokes.
You’ll be invited to heckle Vikings and play Simon Says with a bossy bishop, but the show also doesn’t shy away from the more unsavoury chapters of the past, in a celebration of the good, the bad and the downright bizarre in the history of our glorious, multicultural tongue.
Age guidance: 8 to 108
Tickets from £10
Dates & Tickets
| Date | Time | Ticket |
|---|---|---|
| Thursday 24 September, 2026 | 7:30pm | Buy Tickets |
Reviews
“Another triumph…Remember the name Melanie Branton, if you get the opportunity to see her, please do. She’s bostin bab.”
“A wonderfully eccentric, sharply intelligent, and surprisingly moving evening… Whether she was conjuring smelly Vikings or inviting us to laugh at the pretensions of grammar snobs, she carried the audience along effortlessly, with the kind of charm that makes you want to lean in closer.”
“Energetic and kinetic, she has the enthusiasm of Joyce Grenfell, the forthright inci-siveness of Phoebe Waller-Bridge, the wit of John Hegley and the surreal, prop-rich creativity of Simon Munnery…Funny, informative and clever, The Full English will appeal to pretty much everyone who uses words and likes to laugh.”
“Witty and engaging…what anchors the evening is Branton herself: an articulate, charismatic and deeply knowledgeable guide. Branton cultivates an atmosphere where even the shyest audience member feels safe to join in.”